The Sixty Second Scribe (and current Bard of Stony Stratford) is a special guest at the Scribal Gathering Showcase at The Crown in Stony Stratford, on the 7th June 2022 as part of StonyLive! A 20 minute set of mainly new material, beautifully filmed by Ian Newman, hosted by Jonathan JT Taylor and with sound by Duncan Carter.
poetry
031 – Time to Break Out
Time to Break Out
Never before have I witnessed
Contempt for the truth on this scale
As ministers queue up to lie to
Defend an intolerable tale
They feel their careers’ are unthreatened
That there’s nothing can bring them to book
As long as they just keep on lying
They don’t care how all of this looks
So they lie and deceive to our faces
And expect that we’ll just stay in tow
So we have to make sure that despite that
They end their careers as they go
When Cummings resigns, and he will soon
It must not be the end of this mess
All those who chose to support him
Have questions they need to address
This wasn’t some error of judgement
Or a momentary lapse under strain
It was carefully thought out and conscious
And it sought to deceive us again
These people are not to be trusted
They’ve shown such contempt for us all
We cannot and must not accept this
Let’s break ourselves out of their thrall.
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020
030 – Bursting the Bubble
Bursting the Bubble
I couldn’t conceive a more suitable case
To describe why I’d never vote Tory
Than watching our ministers leap to defend
#classicdom and his Durham trip story
The country has followed instructions
To the letter with all that entails
Often at tragically personal loss
As the common good had to prevail
It brought out the best in our nation
A courageous and mutual endeavour
Though often at deep individual cost
We stood as a nation together.
But today shows that that was a mirage
And that bubble has brutally burst
As ministers queue up to tell us
That it’s ok to put yourself first.
What message that sends to those grieving
And who’ll live with decisions they made
For them now to be told they were wrong to
All so Johnson keeps hold of his aide.
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020
029 – He Turned
He Turned
I’m standing applauding your u-turn
You’re doing what’s good and what’s right
Though denying you had to be dragged here
Does not seem to be all that bright
You had a good chance to be humble
To show that you’re open to change
But to try and pretend this was always your plan
Seems more than a little bit strange
I know, you’d be pounced on by idiots
But they’ll do that whatever you do
It’s those with more sense need to trust you
And to know what you’re saying is true
You’re pushing us into a corner
Where we’re doubting each thing that you say
So for christ’s sake admit when you’ve screwed up
Our mistrust then, might start to allay.
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020
028 – Start The Clock Again
Start The Clock Again
Can you see the pattern?
Have you worked out how they do it?
First they claim they’re in control
When pressed, they bluff right through it.
Then they change their story
And deny what’s said before
And then they’ll set a target
Which they know that they’ll ignore.
Then they’ll claim they’ve hit it
And then they cough and bluster
Then promise ‘jam tomorrow’
With all the vigour they can muster
And all this stays unchallenged
Not a soul prepared to say
This doesn’t match the promises
You made on previous days
So track and trace looms large
World class by 1st June
And as the day approaches
We’ll eat up all they spoon
And when their plan is shown
To be something less than claimed
They’ll set another target
And we’ll start the clock again
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020
027 – Serco Jerks
Serco Jerks
This Track and Trace app’s a concern
Our data it asks us to turn
And hand over freely
To Serco? Christ really?
I wonder if we’ll ever learn
Not to descend to name-calling
But their track records’ truly appalling
False accounting and fraud
Using data that’s flawed
Which perhaps is what I find so galling
So what do I find as I wake?
As today’s headlines started to break
Serco stating remorse
To their tracking workforce
As staff data they’ve shared by mistake.
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020
026 – Journalistic Pleas(e)
Journalistic Pleas(e)
I don’t understand, don’t see how it’s come to this
Even though I’m not a fan of much they do
They haven’t stepped up. Haven’t raised their game at all.
So we have to raise our challenges anew
Our friendly mainstream media, whatever that may mean
Accept lies from MPs in place of facts
Instead of going back the next time that they have a chance
And saying – here you lied, will you retract
Make sure there’s a consequence for not speaking the truth
And call them out as liars in your organ
And give me journalism I can hold in high esteem
So I’m not sat here applauding Piers Morgan
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020
025 – Absence of Childhood
Absence of Childhood
Hands up if you ever ate something
From another kid’s tasty school lunch?
Or had stuff of yours taken from you?
All of you? Well I did have a hunch.
To think that kids don’t share or pilfer?
I admit it, I’m really beguiled
The only way you that could think that?
Never meeting or being a child!
Till now I’d thought that quite unlikely
I’d presumed them as human as I
But maybe they should be examined?
A Voight-Kampff test? Or study their eyes?
Between you and me, let’s be honest
Were they marked as a species apart
I’d find that much simpler to follow
Than the bilge that they share with their charts.
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020
024 – Ass Sanctuary
Ass Sanctuary
Once again the tabloids scream
Man on left is traitor
He’s got this plot of land you see
A property speculator
Of course the headline’s bollocks
You’d have to be a fool
The piece of land’s a sanctuary
For Asses and for Mules
Which kind of writes the joke itself
Believe what’s in the mail?
It’s you then, that’s the donkey
And your conscience that’s for sale
For those you know that like this crap
What you can do for them.
Send them round some donkey pooh
And simply say ‘Eeyore then’
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020
023 – Alternate Fridays
Alternate Fridays
Zoom, Friends, Wine, Chat,
I’m getting rather used to that.
Zoom, Friends, Wine, Debate.
This week, we won’t finish late.
Zoom, Friends, Wine, Quiz.
That’s fun too. It really is.
Zoom, Friends, Port, Chat.
I’m rather pleased I switched to that.
ZoomFriendsPort, 2am?
Can’t believe we’ve done that again.
Port, Port, Port, Bed.
Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, Head.
(c) Michael Gurner – May 2020